R.P.P (Rocket Propelled Pig)

I slept in my daughters bunk beds last night because I couldn’t be bothered to move the humongous pile of laundry covering my unmade bed…..it’s official, I am super lazy. To balance out this house-wife misdemeanour I’ve been out for a power walk this morning with toddler and dog, done all the dishes, two loads of washing (yes more) and I’m now writing a blog post. Unfortunately the laundry pile hasn’t magically ironed itself and is still there on my bed. My efforts this morning have basically made the pile bigger, not the greatest start to the day but following on from yesterday’s happy-a-thon I am going to rectify the situation and tackle it head on….after I’ve written this post and made a coffee.

Today I am going to write about the pensioner assault incident that I alluded to in yesterday’s post (which you can read here if you missed it) I’d like to start by saying that acts of violence against anyone should not be tolerated and even though my toddler is just 20 months old and what happened was really an accident, I still put her in the naughty corner to teach her a lesson. I was also desperately trying to not laugh probably giving myself a hernia in the process. The story goes a little something like this…

Rocket Propelled Pig

Rocket Propelled Pig

Toddler and I were in the waiting room at the train station last week, obviously waiting for our train! Toddler had been given a little Peppa Pig figurine from a friend and had spent the entire morning chewing it, chucking it about and generally having fun. I allowed her to take it on the journey with us as it was doing a sterling job of keeping her occupied while I tried to catch up on some reading while carefully keeping an eye on  her antics. The waiting room at the station is quite small, just three metal wire benches fill the space, so it’s not an ideal space for a game of throw the pig. We were soon joined by an elderly couple who sat at the far (5 feet away) end of the room and after the usual ‘Good Mornings’ ‘Nice weather’ pleasantries they sat down with an audible ‘oooff’ and smiled politely as toddler larked about blowing raspberries on the window. It was at this exact moment that toddler decided to play catch with the elderly woman, without actually telling her and with an effort Jessica Ennis would be proud of, she launched Peppa Pig at the woman, laughing hysterically as it ricocheted off her leg and landed under the bench.  I was horrified and yet quite impressed with her throwing arm! I apologised to the woman who didn’t even flinch (thank God) and as I turned to admonish toddler, trying to stop her from clapping excitedly and demanding another shot, she shouted ‘CATCH’ at the top of her voice. It took all I had not to laugh and firmly put her in the corner to think about her actions (consider her next victim more like).

My brother called me as this drama was unfolding and asked ‘Why is she doing that evil laugh again?’…….. Says it all really.

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